Sad

I love dresses. I love to feel pretty.

Sometimes I put on something pretty and I feel pretty.

When I feel pretty, I feel good. 

When I feel good, I am happy.

But sometimes, I am sad.

I am sad not because I don't feel pretty.

I am sad because I lost many things. I tried very hard to keep them, but I lost them anyway.

I am sad because I feel insignificant. I feel stupid, and sad would be all over me.

I want to talk to my best friend about it. I want my best friend to make me feel better.

But I cannot, because I lost my best friend too.

I tell myself not to think about that any more. I tell myself to let that pass.

Sometimes I want to talk to someone else about it, but I couldn't.

I couldn't, because sad is mine. It is all mine and no one else's.

So I think about it, and share it with myself. I try to make myself feel better.

Sometimes I eat because I am sad.

Sometimes I don't eat because I am sad.

Sometimes I sleep because I am sad.

Sometimes I cannot sleep because I am sad.

I wake up everyday anyway. I see things everyday anyway.

Sometimes, I see things that remind me of other things.

I see the fan. I see the bed. I see pink. I see books.

Sometimes, I see people. I see good, happy people.

I want to be happy like them. I want to be like how I used to be.

Sometimes, I see people. I see sad, angry people.

I don't want to be like them. I want to be like how I used to be.

I hate being sad. I hate everything that makes me sad.

I hate myself for being sad. I don't want to be sad.

I try to leave sad, but sad has been with me for very long now.

I try to get rid of sad, but sad is already a part of me.

So I try not to think about sad. I try to make myself feel better.

Today, I put on a really pretty pink dress.

Sometimes I put on something pretty and I feel pretty.

When I feel pretty, I feel good. 

When I feel good, I am happy.

But sometimes, I am sad.